There are 4 settings to this poem…the wrestling ring, the awkward place, the comfortable place, and the space I can’t get enough of.
the wrestling ring…
We’re on opposite corners of the wrestling ring
Waiting to see who will initiate the battle first
I like you the way you are
Why would I want to battle you?
Then I remind myself
It’s because I couldn’t grow with you
if the scares, sad faces, happy faces, wine tasting, blunt smoking, arguments never existed
It’s because I would have to tell you that secret I’m always trying to erase
I wish we could make love in the middle of this ring but we must converse first
Tell you something that might make you forfet the match…
and so I sit on my corner reading “Sister Citizen” looking up every so often
to see if you’re still there.
The Awkward place…
I don’t love you, I love the experience of you
but you seem to take that as some sort of potential
and then I grinch everytime you ask me out
not because you’re not amazing
but because you see the potential I do not see
and I search for it everytime you make me laugh
but quickly my face turns sad
because your smile is so big, you are enjoying this
I have to cancel our meet ups
because I simply can’t MEET up in awkward places.
The comfortable place…
We don’t try to pretend that we don’t like this space
but we wait and see how strong we’ve build this place
This is a special home I share with you
but so many things I cannot erase from this wall
I want to look into your eyes
but I get distracted by the writings and then I remember and get mad
We talk about it, I’m looking into your eyes
I forget, get comfortable again
I don’t visit the comfortable place often anymore
I cannot do work in a place I constantly want to sleep in.
The space I cannot get enough of…
Oh how I hate this space
I can’t seem to get enough of it
too much sugar but I don’t care
I’m willing to see the dentist!
This space I cannot get enough of is turning into a weird place
selfishness rides its waves here
for some reason I cannot hear you here
I tried to scream before but you just looked away
I love this space, it makes me the happiest
My faults are welcomed here
but this, out of all the spaces, is the scariest of them all
there are no rules, helmets, no cross signs, no alarm clocks,
I just lost the track of time.